Next FOCUS+ Meeting Tues, March 8, 6:30PM

March Topic:

Strategies for Paying Attention Consistently (and other seemingly impossible things)

We’ll be highlighting some suggestions from Dr. Ed Hallowell.

Fascinating New Study on Juvenile ADD

<< WARNING: SATIRE ALERT >>

The following "report" is from The Onion magazine (www.theonion.com), which is a 100% satirical, fake news organization in the same vein as Weekend Update on Saturday Night Live or The Daily Show with Jon Stewart.  As such it should be taken in the spirit intended, which is as a funny joke.  In my experience, those of us with ADHD (or with spouses or kids with ADHD) generally have developed the ability to laugh at ourselves, so I’m sharing it:

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NEWS IN BRIEF

Report: Majority Of ADD Cases Go Undiagnosed Until Child's First Public Failure

WASHINGTON—A new report by the Mayo Clinic revealed that most cases of Attention Deficit Disorder are not diagnosed until one or both parents are publicly humiliated by their child's behavior. "More often than not it takes something like a kid goofing off during a choir recital to act as a wake-up call for parents," said Dr. Emily Chao, who realized her own son had ADD when he forgot his lines and knocked over a piece of scenery during a school play. "While many children's symptoms may not be apparent at first, they become markedly more acute when viewed in a public forum such as a spelling bee." Doctors have also recently discovered a new syndrome that compels unemployed 30-year-olds to move back home even though their parents did a perfectly fine job raising them.

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Was it funny, or should I be more selective in the material I post here?

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Technorati Tags: The Onion,Satire,ADD,FOCUS+

Interesting Articles Regarding Living with an Adult ADHD Partner

Hi all, it's Ed the webmaster/blogmaster again. While surfing the web recently I ran across two brief but interesting articles related to ADHD and adult relationships at www.suite101.com. I thought I'd take a moment to share them with the group. Read on.

When a Loved One Has ADHD

Coping Strategies for Living with Someone with ADHD

Sep 11, 2009 Lucia Jenkins

Living with an ADHD Partner - sharell74

When a loved one has attention deficit hyperactivity disorder his actions may be frustrating and hard to understand.

Living with someone who has ADHD can be quite challenging. An adult who has ADHD has most likely grown up hearing negative messages about his performance, his grades,

and his work ethic. These messages, engrained from childhood, can have an extremely negative impact on anyone. These messages do not simply go away as individuals get

older. In fact, the negative messages continue to play, affecting a person’s self esteem and leaving him with insecurity and shame.

The Impact of ADHD

With a low self esteem and the constant message that nothing they do is right, children graduate into adulthood ill equipped to handle adult relationships, work

situations, deadlines and even social events. Since people with ADHD are often criticized for a lack of effort on their part as children, they easily turn innocent

comments made by loved ones into criticisms against them. When an adult with ADHD continues to feel criticized by a loved one, even when criticism is not meant,

resentment starts to grow.

When a loved one has attention deficit hyperactivity disorder his actions may be frustrating and hard to understand. ADHD adults often find it hard to complete

projects, forget important events, miss details of conversations and not remember agreed upon decisions. While loved ones may try to overcompensate for their ADHD

partners, this only leaves them feeling resentful toward their ADHD partners.

Strategies for Living with Someone with ADHD

An adult with ADHD will have to work hard at having a successful relationship. Those living with an ADHD partner will have to remain flexible and understanding. Here

are some helpful tips for living with someone with ADHD:

Do not overwhelm with details. A person with ADHD may easily feel overwhelmed and quickly tune out. Though an important discussion may need to had, it may be necessary

to break up the discussion or revisit the next day to ensure both partners are on the same page.

Do not criticize. An adult with ADHD has likely grown up being criticized for many things. If a loved one continues the criticism, this will leave the ADHD adult

feeling resentful and may cause even lower self esteem.

Recognize that an ADHD partner cannot simply be better. ADHD is a genetic disorder that must be treated on an ongoing basis to keep under control. Asking a partner to

be better at organizing or remembering things will simply not work and only add to the frustration.

Offer support for ADHD treatments. Finding a treatment that helps is different for each person and may take a while. If an ADHD partner is willing to get help provide

the support and encouragement along the way it will help. Offer loving feedback that will help to determine if the chosen treatment is having any effect.

Having a healthy and successful relationship with an adult with ADHD is possible. There will be challenging and frustrating times for sure. But if each partner is

committed to the relationship and trying to overcome the challenges, a strong and supportive relationship is possible.

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Living with an ADD/ADHD Spouse or Partner

Dealing with Challenges of Adult Relationships Involving ADD/ADHD

May 9, 2009 Joelle Godwin

The prototype for the person with ADD/ADHD is a young person, but what about relationships the ADD/ADHD adult has with his or her spouse or partner?

The average person may think Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) affects only children, or perhaps college age adults. As the population of those diagnosed with the disorder ages, however, it may begin experiencing difficulties in interpersonal relationships, particularly with spouses or close partners.

By the same token, for the partner of the person with ADD or ADHD, understanding how the disorder bears on the relationship can affect quality of life. Often the non-ADD/ADHD can become frustrated and overwhelmed by unfinished home projects, forgotten appointments, or inattention to everyday duties.

Capturing the focus of the spouse or partner with ADD or ADHD is one trick which often keeps a husband or wife from having to repeat themselves. In simple terms, making eye contact and speaking very clearly and directly can help immensely. Writing down reminders to reinforce verbal requests or input is another strategy.

Richard B. Austin, Jr., Ph.D., in his article, Solutions for Intimacy Problems for Adults with ADHD, suggests that “active, careful listening with a feedback loop” is essential to eliminating the gap between adults who have ADHD (or ADD) and those who don’t. The “feedback loop” is simply a way of paraphrasing the non-ADD/ADHD spouse after he or she listens to what is being said. Any discrepancy in meaning can then be clarified. Additionally, it requires concentration on the part of the ADD/ADHD adult.

Allowing adequate time for projects, including time for distractions, can help a couple conquer daily projects as well as long-term goals. Making time lines more realistic by setting “interruption allotments” can prevent frustration. It’s all about expectations. Not lowering them, just being realistic.

Dr. David W. Goodman, M.D., assistant professor of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences at the Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine and Director of the Adult Attention Deficit Disorder Center of Maryland asserts that ADD/ADHD symptoms can increase during stressful times. It is most important for the non-ADD/ADHD spouse or partner to realize at these times that symptoms such as ineffective time management, forgetfulness, and procrastination may worsen due to stress. An adult or couple may want to seek professional psychiatric help involving a combination of drug- and talk-therapy.

No Excuses

Using ADD/ADHD as an excuse, however, is not appropriate. Neither the person with the disorder nor his or her spouse should blame behavior on it. Blaming behavior on the disorder could create a dangerous tendency to absolve the ADD/ADHD person of responsibility.

Of course, if the spouse or partner with ADD or ADHD recognizes the strain his or her disorder places on the relationship he or she may consciously address it. Allowing open discussions about the effects of the disorder on the dynamic between two people is a sign of real willingness to improve the relationship. Remembering to treat adult ADD/ADHD relationships with the respect and care they require is paramount to being successful.

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Feburary 8, 2011: Exercise & ADHD Notes

This month’s topic was Exercise and ADHD, starting with a quick Powerpoint presentation by Ruth Evenhouse providing and overview of how ADHD directly impacts a person’s brain chemistry in ways that directly, and positively, impact many of the symptoms of ADHD and related issues such as anxiety or depression. (Click here to see the presentation)

Much of the material was borrowed from two highly recommended books:

The ADHD Handbook (Available in most bookstores and at Amazon.com), specifically Chapter 3, which is dedicated to incorporating exercise into your lifestyle as an ADHD management tool, and
Spark: The Revolutionary New Science of Exercise and the Brain (Also available at Amazon.com. But first, a quick motivational video from two of the world’s all-time leading experts on the merits of exercise:

Our group was also joined by our guest presenter, Claudina Brinks from Snap Fitness of Holland, MI, who discussed many of the issues that impact

how anyone (definitely including those of us with ADHD) fares with getting started on an exercise program, staying with the program, and getting the best results from their program.

So where to begin? Breathing. Just the simple act of efficiently breathing in fresh oxygen and breathing out carbon

dioxide has an immediate calming effect on your mind and body, improving focus, sensory perception and thinking.

We practiced the “five second rule, inhaling through our noses for a count of five, then exhaling through our mouths for a similar five-count. Most members noticed that doing this allowed them to inhale more deeply with practice, enhancing the effects of deep breathing.

Next we talked about developing an exercise program that will work best for each of us. This process starts with understanding ourselves at a deeper level: motivations, preferences, available resources (time, money, ability), goals, etc. Claudina shared a quick questionaire (click here to download a copy of it) she uses with most of her fitness customers to help with this process; we’ll post this in the next blog entry if you’d like to fill it out for your own use.

Finding Something You Love: We all tend to work harder and more consistently with an exercise program, and stick with it longer, if it’s an activity that we genuinely enjoy. How to Find Your Activity:	OVERHEARD “I love Swimming.” Tom (swimmer)
If you’re new to exercise, seek out other people; test drive new activities. Maybe volleyball turns out not to be your thing, but the next week when you try step aerobics, you find a winner! Newbie at a health club? Tag along with a friend to feel more comfortable.	“I love Not Swimming.” Ed (runner)

Can’t afford a health club? Improvise at home. Soup cans or milk jugs (partially) filled with water work fine for strength training. Walking, dancing to music with soup cans, jogging in place while watching your favorite TV show are all free, easy solutions to get you started.

Here are some great leads for popular athletic sports and activities to get you started in your exploration:

Walking/Jogging/Running/Biking Courses & Events

• Calendar of upcoming running races (from 1 mile walks and 5K Turkey Trots to full marathons): http://www.runmichigan.com/
• Calendar of upcoming mountain bike races: http://mmba.org/

Like walking or running but want something a little different?

• List of national Volksmarch (“People’s Walk”) events throughout the U.S.: http://ava.org/
• Find out about Geocaching (scavenger hunts using GPS systems) at http://www.geocaching.com/

• Or if you want something truly, deeply offbeat, check out the Grand Rapids Hash House Harriers, a local chapter of an international club that describes itself as “a drinking club with a slight running problem”: http://www.grh3.com/

Looking or something in the winter?

• Listing of Michigan Cross-Country Ski Trails and Events: http://www.michigan.org/Things-to-Do/Snow-Sports/Cross-Country-Skiing/Default.aspx

Overcoming Excuses & Sticking With It:

Get a partner or join a group. Peers help to keep you honest and motivated and can provide valuable tips on how to improve your performance. Be SMART:

Keep goals Specific, Measurable, Action-oriented, Realistic & Timed.

• Specific:
  • Not “I’m trying to lose weight”, but
  • I’m trying to lose 10 pounds”
• Measurable:
  • You can’t manage what you can’t measure.
  • Are you interested in tracking your weight?
  • The duration of your workout?
  • The distance of your run/bike ride/etc.?
  • Your range of motion?
  • How much you can lift?
  • How far you can hit the ball?
  • How often you work out?
• Action-Oriented:
  • “I’ll do this by exercising at least 20 minutes per day, at least 3 days per week.”
• Realistic:
  • If you’re 100 pounds overweight and you have a bad back and messed up knees, getting the body of Chris Evans in The First Avenger: Captain America is not realistic, I’m sorry to say.

• Timed:
  • Set a time frame for achieving your goal.
  • Break big goals (running a marathon, for instance) down into smaller, more manageable sub-goals.

In the end it’s really not about ADHD, is it? Regardless of whether or not any of us has any sort of physical, mental, cognitive, sensory or emotional impairments, we all know that incorporating a reasonable level of physical activity and a healthy diet into our lives helps us to think, feel and perform better and have an improved quality of life. And if you have to go through life with ADHD, wouldn’t it be a more fun experience if you could do it fitting into your skinny jeans or being able to knock off 20 push-ups if the mood ever struck you?

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ADHD & Humor: Some ADHD-themed comics

Click here to see a few comics shared by one of our FOCUS+ group members that remind us that it's okay to laugh at ourselves once in a while....

Yes, I know the comic artist in the picture above doesn't look like he's laughing, but at least I managed to manipulate the clip art image enough that he's wearing the ever-popular (and very funny) , AC/DC inspired, AD/HD t-shirt, so you know he has a sense of humor. Still not convinced? You're going to just have to trust me on this one, faithful blog reader...he's laughing on the inside, just hyperfocused on his work at this particular moment.

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Exercise & ADHD Pre-Read Material (if you're into the whole pre-read thing)

EXERCISE & ADHD PRE-READ MATERIAL
(If you're into the whole pre-read thing)

Common sense tells us all that exercise is good for us...and it is.

But for people with ADHD, exercise offers some additional benefits that can directly improve how "symptomatic" we are. Plus, if you have to have ADHD, wouldn't it be more fun to have it inside of a strong, toned, lean beach body instead? I digress.

The following links are to a half-dozen good (and short) articles outlining the case for making exercise a key element of your ADHD management strategy.

Exercise and ADHD Symptoms (John J. Ratey, MD)

Exercise: An Alternative ADHD Treatment Without Side Effects

Exercise & ADHD (LIVESTRONG.COM)

Battling the Blues with Exercise

Get Moving!

Exercise & ADHD: Stop Stopping and Start Starting!

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January 11, 2010 meeting summary

We had a small turnout for tonight's meeting, largely due to the winter weather, but we were joined by three first-time participants (welcome, everyone!) and one second-time, came-once-a-long-time-ago participant (welcome again). Notably absent for literally only the second time in five years of FOCUS+ meetings was our usual group leader, Ruth Evenhouse. We missed you, Ruth!

In addition to passing out the following items, we introduced ourselves to the newcomers and got to know them as well.

• Exercise & ADHD Handout/Questionaire
• Is It Depression or ADHD Handout
• How to Comment on this Blog Handout

As our first-timers shared their stories, we identified several resources that have been listed in past blog entries, including

• TheLakeshore Disability Network
• Michigan Rehabilitation Services
• The FOCUS+ web site (http://www.focus-plus.org/), with "So you're new to ADHD" information
• Links to pharmaceutical company web sites that explain how the companies offer low- or no-cost prescription medications for families who can't otherwise afford them
• Astra Zeneca: www.astrazeneca-us.com/help-affording-your-medicines/prescription-saving-program
• Shire: http://www.shirecares.com/Forest Pharmaceuticals: http://www.frx.com/

Again, our next meeting is on Tuesday, February 11, 6:30 p.m., with guest presenter Claudia Brink discussing Exercise and ADHD. See you there!